My name is Dennis Majors. I’m 37 years old. I’m unemployed and don’t have any real friends or family. No one to miss me. That’s why I need you. I’ve been...going somewhere. But also nowhere. I wake up and I’m in my apartment, but it’s not my apartment. None of this makes sense, I know,... Continue Reading →
Do you know where the babies go? When the sun is set and sinking low? Crying all day, quiet at night How many babies are the down hag’s delight? One...two...three… Every little girl in my town knew the down hag’s diddy. We’d chant it while jumping rope, counting off how many times we could jump... Continue Reading →
I’m co-creator, co-writer, and a voice actor in Calling Darkness, a horror comedy podcast that launched today! Listen here!
I know what happens to you when you die: You become a file. If you led a good life, that is to say, one filled with first class travel, designer labels, and a “small” villa in the French countryside, you’re a fat file. If you were the Average Joe, you end up an average file.... Continue Reading →
It snows at sea. Sometimes I forget that. Or, I try to, anyway. Frozen white on an endless field of black. It feels alien out there when it’s snowing. Maybe I’d feel differently if it hadn’t been snowing that night. But it was, and I don’t, and I’ll never know otherwise. Dad was a crabber.... Continue Reading →
Twelve hour shifts were hard, especially at the holidays, when all I wanted was to be home with my own family. I'd been lucky enough to have Christmas off, which was by far the more important day in my opinion, so I really shouldn't have been too bothered, but it did mean spending New Year's... Continue Reading →
It was the week before Christmas; the homestretch. I should have been feeling all holly and jolly, filled with the spirit of the season, but it was hard when I was stuck trekking through a crowded department store filled with other last-minute shoppers, trying to keep up with my two boys as they bounced from... Continue Reading →
In movies, right before a traumatic accident happens, the screen cuts to black. When it reopens again, it’s in The After. There’s no hospital with all the tubes and machinery, no physical therapy, no one holding up the attractively scuffed main character while he tries to remember how to pee straight. They’re just home. Sometimes... Continue Reading →